Jewish Inspiration Podcast · Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe

You're listening to Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe of TORCH in Houston, Texas. This is the Jewish Inspiration Podcast.

And now my dear friends, day number 150 on the top of page 823 in the Gate of Repentance in the Treasure for Life edition of the Ways of the Righteous. HaShlishi, what is the third step? And this is really part of the first step, which is Hayyagon, sorrow. He says, if someone loses money, they get very sad. They're very sad. They're very upset. I can't believe it.
I lost my wallet. I lost my phone. Whatever it is that people lose that's valuable to them. Someone loses their house. Oh, they, they, they, they, they're inconsolable. Someone loses money. I had a few hundred dollar bills in my pocket. Where did it disappear to? A person gets like, oh, oh. Okay, it's not, it's not, it's not great, right? And if a person has any type of tsoros, tsoros means troubles, aggravation, any type of, any type of trouble that befalls a person.
Yitztar mo, a person will be very, very sad. Kal v'chomesh yitztar mi shemorod ba'adon ha'godo lehash chizdar kol afonav. Certainly, a person should have tremendous sorrow for the pain that it causes our relationship with G-d. And G-d doesn't have pain, just like G-d doesn't have happiness. G-d doesn't get a cold, and that G-d doesn't have sick days, and G-d doesn't have cravings for coffee, right? G-d is omnipotent, and G-d is way above all of that kind of earthly temptation, desire, limitation,
etc. So what is it? It's our connection with G-d that we are in sorrow for. Because when I do a sin, what am I doing? I'm creating a barrier between me and G-d. I want to be close to, I want to be one with G-d, and when I sin, what happens? It creates a barrier, and a bigger barrier, and a bigger barrier. I want to be close, I want to get back to you. So what do we have to do?
We have to remove all of those barriers, move it away, so that now we can come close to G-d. And this is the process. You have to feel bad that you created this barrier between you and G-d. You, not meaning you, meaning the person who sinned, obviously. You are all righteous. I'm the sinner here, okay, just so we know. And what does G-d do, even though we create this barrier? G-d doesn't say, oh, you created a barrier between us. Now you're not going to be able to drink.
Now you're not going to be able to eat. Now you're not, G-d doesn't do that. Why? Because G-d is so merciful, and so loving, and so kind, and so benevolent, and so magnanimous, that G-d doesn't take away our resources because we did some sin. G-d continues to give, and He continues to give, and He continues to give. And you're like, you're wondering, why do evil people still have air to breathe? Shouldn't G-d turn off power?
No, because G-d wants our closeness. G-d wants us to return to Him in teshuvah. So this is the gift. G-d does unbelievable kindness. Even more so should our sorrow be in place when G-d continues to bestow goodness and kindness upon us, and we continue to stab G-d in the back. He continues to give us good, and we continue to harm the relationship. V'da, sheh madrego seh teshuvah mal'oseh lefi godol amrirus ve'hadzara al'avei reshasa.
You want to know how great the teshuvah will rise, the closeness of the relationship will rise? It depends on how disappointed you are in yourself. It's like, imagine a husband and wife. A husband does something to damage the relationship. So what is the wife now? The wife is upset. She's upset at her husband because you created a break in the bond. Why? Because now we're distant. It's very painful to have that distance. So what is, if he's really
sorrowful for what he's done, he's got a better chance than saying, hey, listen, just grow up. These things happen. No, that's not the way it works. The more regret and sorrow one has for the thing they did wrong, the more likely it is for that relationship to be healed. And that's what we're attempting to do in our teshuvah. Ki'atsar ba mitaharas ha'neshama ha'elyona. Where does this pain come from? Where does this pain, this sorrow come from?
The more purity you have in the neshama, meaning you worked it out and you're like, this is terrible. I cannot believe I did this. I did this to the person who loves me. The person, now obviously, Almighty loves us a lot more than any person. How can I have done this? Hashem loves me and He keeps on giving and giving and giving, and this is my thank you. It's such pain. Which is why someone who really does teshuvah, it's very easy to cry and to realize how much remorse,
how much sorrow we feel for the mistakes we've done against who? The one and only Creator of heaven and earth who loves us more than anything in the world. V'ha'kodesh boruchum mirachim al ha'odam be'yos nishmos o'shruyo b'tzara al p'shov. When a person has that sorrow for the sins they've done, to hurt the relationship between man and God, Hashem has pity and Hashem has grace and Hashem says, come, come. Yosei ma'asher t'rotzei b'rov yisuri ha'guf ma'chovav.
Do you think that Hashem wants to punish us, to harm us, to hurt us, to make us ill, God forbid? Hashem to give us punishment? No! Hashem much prefers that we come with tears of love than tears of pain. And here I'll give you an example. The author says, Ki ha-melech yirachim yoser al yelidei beso ha'korovu me'lov, ve'heim me'otsilei ha'aretz ha'nechbadim mimash yirachim al ha'kafriim. L'chein kish ha'neshama shenifrida mele'mal me'makom kadosh, kish hi mitzta'eres al avona ozi kableno me'hero yotzer ha'kol.
He says, who does the king have a closer relationship with? The people of his household, the people in the palace, or the guy out in the fields? The poor people he's close with. He says, who is Hashem closest to? The neshama, the neshama that comes from Hashem, given from Hashem. So imagine if that neshama feels total remorse. It feels sorrow. Hashem's like, here, come, come home. Come home. I want you close to me. So that's the third, real sorrow. Number four, yogun v'tzar ba'ma'aseh.
He says, sorrow and grief indeed, in the deed that we did. Ad kan dibarno mitzar vi'yogun ba'leiv. He says, till now we're talking about pain in our heart. We feel regret in our heart. We feel sorrow in our heart. He says, but now in action. V'ze'inenu v'tzar vi'yogun ba'ma'aseh. He says, putting it into action. Kemo shinema ve'gam aton u'ma'shem, shuvi adai b'chol l'vavchem u'b'tzum u'b'v'hi u'v'misfed. He says, and Joel again talks about about repentance.
And even now says Hashem, turn to me with all your heart and with fasting and with weeping and with lamentation, meaning there is part of this process which isn't just the heart. It's teshuva in action, doing it with action. What's that? Actually crying, fasting, saying, you know what, I have to do something to show physically that I'm taking this serious. I'm taking this seriously. V'tzarich le'haros simonei tzar vi'yogun ba'ma'amushav. And a person, if they can,
should also feel signs of grief and sorrow in their clothing. Kigon lach gorsak, like wearing sackcloth, ashes, a type of mourning for the relationship that I broke. How could I have done that? I feel so terrible. Who did this? The famous story of Esther. What happened? Mordechai realized we went astray. So it's not enough to just say, Hashem, we're sorry. He says, no, no, no, we have to fast. It's not enough to fast. We have to change the way we dress
so that we don't forget, so that we don't just get carried away and go back to Achashverosh's party and get drunk. We have to be different. We have to dress different. We have to act different. We have to do it in a physical way. Not enough to just, oh, in my heart, I feel terrible. Regret, yeah, sorrow, yeah. Sorry, God, forgive me, please. It's a process. It's a real process. Kimo shenemar, alzoz chigru sakem siptu v'hillelu, and we see by Jeremiah,
for this, gird yourself with sackcloth, lament, and wail, u'kimo shenemar va'yiskasu sakem ha'odam ve'habehemu, as it says, and let them be covered with sackcloth, both men and animal, and one must rid himself of his special clothing and minimize pleasures in food, drink, habitation, and excursions. Meaning, you can't just say, God, I'm sorry. I said I'm sorry, so now leave me alone, okay? I said I'm sorry. It's like children sometimes, they don't realize that just saying I'm sorry
doesn't mean that the other person now is healed. You punch the guy in the eye and you say, hey, I'm sorry. They're like, what do you mean? What do you mean I'm sorry? Show more than just words, more than just words, in action. Go get them ice, go take care of them, drive them to the hospital, like be involved physically in that process. V'amru ra'bisenu z'chanu levrocha, sages of blessed memory said, so by the way, one of the ways
that a person can physically limit themselves from worldly pleasures or just moving on with life is fasting from food, from drink, from pleasures, from travel, just like really, really connect with what's going on here. Our sages of blessed memory says, ha'alei ve'einayim sh'nei sarsuri ya'cheit. The eyes and the heart are two agents of sin. V'chein kosuv, as the verse states, we say this in Shema, v'los ha'sura a'chei levavchem v'a'chei nechem, and you should not go astray
after your hearts and after your eyes. V'lochein be'zos y'chupar ov'nasar surim. So when a person overcomes his eyes and his heart, he is going to do a repair for the sins of his eyes and his heart. Therefore, in the following manner, the sins of these agents are to be atoned for. The sin of the agency of the heart through bitterness and grief, and the sin of the agency of the eyes through tears, as it is written, my eyes have run with rivers of water
because they have not fulfilled your Torah. Meaning, for things that a person looks at that bring in desire and temptation, they need tears. For things that a person may have done with the sin of their heart, that is the bitterness and grief, the pain that you feel for the sin that you may have done. V'chein be'zos y'chupar ov'nasar surim. Ov'nasar suras aleiv b'mir y'rusfetsar. V'ov'nasar surus ha'enayim y'chupar bedmos. Therefore, the sin of the eyes is repaired through tears.
As the verse states, pal gemayim yordu enay al lo shomru surasecha. And that's the verse we brought from Psalms. My eyes have run with rivers of water because they have not fulfilled your Torah. And it is not because I have not fulfilled, but because they have not fulfilled. Not because I in action, because they, my eyes, have not fulfilled. Al'kein ho'radeti pal gemayim. And therefore, my eyes, for the sins of my eyes, for the things that brought desire
and temptation into my life and sin into my life through the things that I saw, therefore, I cried my eyes. When a person does cry over his sins, Yomar d'mo sa'yecha b'charon ha'pcho. U'tshuv ha'sma ha'sai y'shivu ha'pcho mimeni. May my tears, a person should say when they're crying on Rosh Hashanah, on Yom Kippur, in the 10 days of repentance, or for any time a person has tears. I tell my children all the time, if you're already crying, pray for the temple, right?
Because it says the temples will be built from our tears, from the tears of our suffering, of our exile that we are in right now. Even though we love Texas and we love the United States and we love freedom and we love all of the amazing things that we experience, but we're still in exile. We're still in exile. We have to remember that. So when we cry tears, those tears are cherished by the Almighty because those tears are repentance.
May my tears extinguish, the verse says, extinguish your burning wrath and the repentance of my deeds, withdraw your wrath from me and my unset table, unset because of my fast, because when a person fasts, they're clearly not eating, be considered as an altar set before you and the pot which I have not placed upon the fire as a flame burning upon your altar and may the diminishing of my blood through fasting atone for me
as the blood upon the corners of the altar and the diminishing of my fats be as the fats of the sacrificial portion and the sound of my crying as the sound of the temple songs and the aroma of the hunger of my soul as the aroma of the incense and the weakness of my limbs as the cutting of the offering and let the breaking of my heart tear up the scrolls in which my sins have been recorded
and the changing of my special garments be regarded as the donning of the priestly garments and my abstention from washing as the sanctification of the hands and feet and may my acts of penitence return you to me to accept me for I have repented of the wickedness of my deeds and I will not be evil before you again. See here, he brings an amazing thing that each thing, the chesron dami, my blood that now is not circulating in the same way.
Yechaper kadam alak alak kranos hamezbeach. Just like they would sprinkle the blood on the corners of the temple. Mi yutchal bi kecheleva emurim and he goes beautifully here. The author is explaining how each part of the process of this repentance in a physical way, limiting ourselves from pleasures, not continuing just with the regular pleasures of life, but really changing the way we act has a tremendous power to serve just like the temple. So when we fast on an ordinary day,
it's for the sins that we've done. Kem kippur, for the sins we may have done throughout the year. We just last week on Thursday, we had the fast of Tzum Gedalia, of the fast of Gedalia. That was a public, it became a public fast because of the sins of the Jewish people. The fast of Esther, the 10th of Teves, the fast of the 17th of Tammuz, the 9th of Av. These are not only for something that happened back then,
it's for today. Our temple isn't restored today because we're not worthy of the temple being restored. So we have the same sins of then. So we have a lot to do repentance for. Okay, so that concludes day number 150.

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