Jewish Inspiration Podcast · Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe

You're listening to Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe of TORCH in Houston, Texas. This is the Jewish Inspiration Podcast.

Welcome back. Good evening, everybody. Welcome to the Jewish Inspiration Podcast. We are in the middle of page 846 in the Treasure for Life edition of the Orchas Tzadikim, Ways of the Righteous, in the middle of the Gate of Repentance. So as we mentioned previously, there are many factors in repentance that need to be clarified. Today we're going to continue with some of those clarifications.
Of the 24 things that we previously mentioned, there's five specific things that the transgressor cannot perform a complete repentance from. What are they? Because they are sins that are between men and his fellow. Since you did it behind your friend's back, your friend doesn't even know to forgive you. All right, so that's a big problem. What are those five things? So if someone curses a populace, an entire community, all of those people, that synagogue, whatever it is,
you know, those people, someone who does that, there's no individual that you can go ask forgiveness from. So all of those people essentially are those who are affected and whose forgiveness one must request. And even if one is asked to forgive, to whom should he forgive? Because he doesn't know who the perpetrator is, and because he did it with the perpetrator, he did it as well. Shearing stolen goods with the thief. So imagine this, you're the investor,
you're the silent investor in the thievery of someone who goes and breaks into people's homes. You don't know which house he's breaking into. You don't know whose purse he's pickpocketing. You don't know. You just know that you're the silent silent partner there, and now you want to return that stolen goods, that stolen item, and you don't have it to return it because you don't know where, who was stolen from. So that's also. Number three.
You find something, the Torah commands us that if you find something, you must announce it so that the person who lost it should be able to come and reclaim it. So for example, this is something that happens in our neighborhood. You know, right in front of my house, there are about several hundred children that walk by on a daily basis, and on Shabbos, it's even more. All right, little boys, little girls, older, younger, parents, strollers, you name it.
It happens many times that, you know, they're walking with the stroller, they don't notice, and a pacifier falls out, or a baby bottle falls out, or a hat, or a, whatever it may be, a scarf. We don't have scarves in Houston, but, right, but something like that, it falls out, and you have no idea. I come out there Shabbos afternoon, when hundreds of people already walked by, and I see this little pacifier on the floor. What am I supposed to do with it?
Right, so there's a special mitzvah in the Torah to return a lost object. Now what happens, if you don't return it, you bring it into your house, and you just forget about this mitzvah, and now you're not using it, but you're not either returning it. This is problematic. You have to return a lost object, not return it per se, because what's if you can't find the owner? But you have to announce it. Right, because
since a person may not have announced this item, so now he doesn't know who the owner is, he definitely doesn't know who to ask forgiveness from. One who eats the food of a pauper, or the food of orphans and widows, these are such unfortunate people. They are not known, and who wander from village to village, from city to city. He doesn't know, imagine someone goes into the food pantry, where people, poor people, come to the community to collect money,
charity, this is where they feed them from, this is a person stole food from that food pantry, heaven forbid, who are you returning it to? Those people now weren't properly fed in the city, now they have to go elsewhere to find food. So that's also something that a person has to be extremely cautious of. Shod B'dalos, Loshon Dochak, it uses the term shor, which really should be shod, which is oppression, oppressing others. Perush, shohudochek elo ha'aniyim b'chov shehem chayyavim lo,
at shem machlitim lo karkosem o'metaltolin shel lohem b'pochos mishov yom. So he says it presses people, people who are poor, they need food, but now they don't have food. So he presses on them to pay back what they owe from the, let's say, you know, Houston has a loan organization, what's it, Houston Free Loan Association, HFLA. Imagine someone owes money, and now they're not getting money, they're not able to earn the money, you're not paying them on time, whatever it may be, and now
they have to sell their property to sustain their family. They have to sell their home for less than its value. They have to sell their car for less than its value because they just, I just need to put food on my table. And what, how does this come? It comes from you not doing what you're responsible to do to help them. Ve'eino choshev sheyesh b'zechet, ki hu omer sheli, I need no tell. He's saying to himself, I'm not, I don't owe anybody anything, right?
A person has to be careful about that. And the fifth object is, the fifth item is, ve'ha mekabel shochad la'hatoz din. Someone who takes a bribe in order to pervert judgment. Ve'einu yode'a ad heichon me'giya hataya zo, ve'kama kolcha. He has no idea how much, to what extent, this perversion and what ramifications are resulted from a false judgment because of bribery. Kidei sheyachzer ha-dovor, shehadovor yesh la'raglayim, ve'ot shehu omachzik yidei ze shehito lo ha-din omachti oso. So let's give a case. Someone is, is
in a dispute about business, a dispute about something. Whatever it may be, FBI comes, they raid his home. So everybody, it's in the news, everybody knows about this. Wow, it's terrible. Okay. Now what happens, it was really a mistake. They went to the wrong house. Right now, how are you restoring this person's job? He lost his job. I know somebody, by the way, that this happened to. He was working, I'm not gonna say what industry he was in, but one day FBI agents come into his office and
arrest him in front of all of his co-workers and they walk him out and he's in court. I get a phone call from his wife, frantic, frantic, that he was just picked up by the FBI and I have to go to the, to the, to the, to the downtown to, he's, he's gonna, he's having a trial of it, a first hearing, whatever it was. And then he was in court for two years fighting with the, with the
agencies and then it turned out they got the wrong guy. It wasn't even him. It turned out it wasn't him. He had a Russian name. They thought he was the guy they were looking for and he wasn't. And now what are you gonna do? The guy lost his job. He lost his marriage. He lost his home. To restore all the damage that was done and it was all a mistake.
What do you think, they're apologizing him and calling his employer saying you could take him back in? They're like, no. What does that mean? He's, he's banned from ever working in that company again. Why? Because, because someone who is accused wrongly, someone who is not, not dealt with in the right way and now is impacted by it, it's a devastating impact, a devastating impact because now you ruined their whole life. You ruined their, their children don't want to talk to them, whatever it may be.
You know, you can imagine the damage that, that, that happens and that was all by mistake. They picked the wrong guy. Simple. Yeah, but by the time it would, the judgment came through, it was already too late. Marriage was gone. The job was gone. Everything was gone. So this is a tragic result. Imagine if we do that, God forbid, in our community, in our congregations. If, God forbid, someone accuses their fellow wrongly.
You stole, you cheated, you this, you broke the contract, you weren't honest, you went this, and then it turns out it was the wrong, it was the wrong. It wasn't, it wasn't cameraman. It was camera blot. You know what I mean? It was a different name. I didn't know. It was the same thing. I thought it was the same and, and, and by that time already, it's, it's all gone. It's like they say that when you accuse someone wrongly, well, you remember the other thing with the pillows?
So you take all the feathers out of the pillow, right? Once the feathers are out of the pillow, you can't put them back in. Once all of those rumors go around, it's too late to put it back in and that is a tragedy. Okay, U'ma'osim eser ve'arba dvorim. So of the 24 things that, that, that we talked about, there's also things, eser ve'arba, there's, there's five things, yesh chamish ha-dvorim, ha'os ha'osan, eim ches'koso lo shuvmehem. It's very difficult to return from them as well.
Lefishem dvorim kalim be'ein eirov, because in most people's eyes, it's not a big deal. Not because you don't know who it is, because it's not a big deal. It's such a big deal. What are they? V'nim tzechote, it turns out that this person sins. V'hu'nir lo she'in tzechot chet. He doesn't even realize that what he did was a sin. Okay, that's why, because it seems simple. What are they? What do you think they are? What's something which is so simple? You want to hear an amazing halacha?
Amazing halacha. It says that you cannot eat from a meal that is not enough for its master. Meaning, if someone has a little bit of lunch, he has a little bit of, you know, he brought a little sandwich. You say, hey, can I, can I get some of your sandwich? All right, if he's not going to eat enough of a sandwich, he's gonna be hungry. So that's considered a meal that's not enough. Suda she'in ha-maspekist ha-ba'aleah. Ha'och ha-mesuda she'in ha-maspekist ha-ba'aleah.
You see someone sitting down, you say, hey, can I sit down with them? Even if you're best friends, you drink some of his beer, you drink, he doesn't have enough for himself almost, right? It's a little beer, right? Or whatever the food is, and you take away some of what their sustenance is, shezeh avak gezal. This is a form of, it's called the dust of theft. It's not exactly thievery, because the guy let you, but you're sort of pressured.
It's like, you know, he only has a little bag of potato chips, and that's it, he has to eat today, and now you ate half of his bag. You understand? Something to be very, very cautious of, again. Suda she'in ha-maspekist ha-ba'aleah. A meal that is not enough to satiate its master. So now you're taking half of their meal. They're gonna be hungry. This is an example of this, is someone entering a poor man's home and having food in
abundance set before him, not out of goodwill of the poor man, but rather because he is ashamed to offer his guest a small portion, in which case the guest feels that he has not sinned, as the poor man has fed him voluntarily and not, and has not been coerced to do so. So imagine this. You're a guest in a poor man's home. He now is embarrassed. He doesn't want to not feed you enough. So he overextends himself beyond what he's capable of.
This is another form of this. So now you made him spend money on you that he doesn't have. Gotta be careful about this. The second thing, what is that? He says, you know, if someone takes out a loan, what do you need to do to receive a loan? You give collateral. All right? So if I come and I borrow your car, I borrow money. So you say, okay, do you have a drill? Give me the drill. Okay, now you're holding on to the poor man's drill.
You're holding on to the poor man's drill. You're holding on to the poor man's drill. You're holding on to the poor man's drill. Do you have a drill? Give me the drill. Okay, now you're holding on to the poor man's drill. You say, you know what? Won't hurt him if I use the drill. Right? I'll just use the drill. It's not a big deal. I have it anyways, collateral. Might as well use it.
Let me just, I just have a few screws to drill into the wall. It's not a big deal, right? But that is a form of theft. It's a form of theft and such a person thinks to himself, I didn't do anything wrong. What did I do wrong? You have to ask forgiveness, but he doesn't even know that it is, because he considers it to be nothing. It's not a big deal, but it's theft. HaMistaka Ba'arai is Ki HaMistaka Choshev B'Libo She'en B'Kach Klum. One who gazes at at women
which is, which could bring a person to desires and to urges and this is inappropriate. Ki HaMistaka Choshev B'Libo She'en B'Kach Klum. He says, what's the problem? No harm, no foul. What did I do? I didn't hurt anybody. I didn't kill anybody, right? V'shehu omer v'chi ba'alti or karavti etzla? Did I do something with the woman? I didn't. I just feasted my eyes in the sight that I saw. V'hu einu yodea she'i yas ha'ayin avon godo, she'i goremes le'gufon shal aroyes.
She'nei marvelos hasorach l'vavchem v'rachein nechem. He doesn't know that he's actually the worst state and do not go astray after your heart and after your eyes. Right, it's going astray even though you say I didn't do anything, didn't do anything, didn't act upon it, right? But still it's considered something which is in the realm of inappropriateness. V'hamiskabit b'klon chaveira, someone who aggrandizes himself through the disparagement of someone else. You take honor. I'm better than this guy. I'm more reliable than him, right?
I'm more trustworthy. My business deals are better than his, right? And people can not, it's fine if you say that you're good and you're trustworthy, but why on the account of somebody else? It's called ha'miskabit b'klon chaveira. Omer b'libo, he says she'ein ochet, the person says to himself, the person who talks like that, says it's not a sin. L'fi she'ein chaveira omed etzlo, v'lo gi'ah lo boshes v'lo b'isho. He says my friend is not sitting right here. He doesn't, he wasn't embarrassed.
So imagine someone says, I don't know, should I, should I invest with you? Should I invest with Joe Schmoe? He says, Joe Schmoe, watch out for him, right? He said he wasn't there. He wasn't, Joe Schmoe wasn't there in front of you and therefore you say like what? I didn't embarrass him. He wasn't there. He doesn't even know that I spoke about him. It was just for me to close the deal, but you're doing it on someone else's back. Elo hu orach masav hatovim.
He only talked about his own good deeds. V'chochmos v'charifuso, he talked about his own wisdom, his own sharpness. L'mul mas chaveira, contrasting it to his friend, v'chochmos v'charifuso, and his sharpness and abilities. Be'enei ha'shomet devorav, yiyehu mechubed v'chaverei bazui, but because in the ears and in the eyes of the listener, you're elevating yourself by knocking the other guy down and therefore it's considered a, another form of a forgiveness that one needs to attain.
Next, the fifth, and that is v'hachoshet b'chayim, someone who wrongfully judges their fellow when they're innocent. Omer b'liboshey nochoteh, a person who does that, who judges someone unfavorably, thinks it's not a sin, le'fi yishu hu omer, ma'asisu, I didn't do anything to him, v'halo lo'asisi shum dober el hachashat ba'amahu. He says I only suspected. I didn't do anything. I didn't say anything. I just suspected that he, you know, it turns out I was wrong. Okay, big deal, no harm, no foul.
v'hu aynu yodeh shezeh ovengadol, but this person doesn't realize that this is a grave sin, shemeisim odum kosher bedat to kibbala verus, because in your eyes you're saying about somebody who's innocent that he's guilty. Someone that is holy, you're saying that he's unholy and it's just a suspicion alone and therefore, so these are the things the author of the Orcha Tzadikim is guiding us. He's guiding us that we have to be so careful about how we interact with other people.
We're not talking about where you embarrass someone in public and everybody knows and everybody saw it and six people came to you and said, you know, you should probably apologize, right? That we know, those are the sins we know, but judging someone with the lack of favorability, that's not such a big deal. It's just me within myself. I suspected that he was not doing something right and it turns out I was wrong, so big deal. You have to go and ask forgiveness.
These are the things when we're talking about shuvah, if we want complete and total. Now, why is it important? Why is it important? Because our sages teach us that exactly the way you judge others is the way you will be judged. What does that mean? What does that mean? So let's give an example here. Imagine the following. Imagine you come up to the heavenly courts and God says, ooh, look who's here. Ah, I have someone who's a fresh set of eyes.
Come, we want to show you a video about someone's life and we want you to tell us how we should judge this person. And you don't realize, but the person you're judging and you're seeing in that video is yourself. So the way in which you train yourself, our sages teach us, to judge others is the way you will end up being judged, because you're going to be your own judge.
You're going to be looking at that video of the person, but you can't see their face. You don't know who they are. You're not going to recognize them. And you'll be like, oh, this guy's terrible, because that's the way we trained ourselves to judge. But if we learn and train ourselves to judge favorably, then when we see the video of ourselves, you really meant well. Because, by the way, that's what we do for ourselves, right? How many times do we say to ourselves, you know something?
How is this guy driving? This guy is such a terrible, look, it's so cutting into the lane. He's so not courteous. What's wrong with this guy? But if, God forbid, it's us, everybody understands I'm in a rush. I'm late to my meeting. I got to get there on time. Everybody knows, right? We think everybody judges us favorably, but we can never judge other people favorably. We have to train ourselves to judge ourselves the way we want to be judged.
You want to be given the benefit of the doubt, give others the benefit of the doubt. So that, my dear friends, concludes day number 156.

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