Jewish Inspiration Podcast · Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe

Welcome back everybody to way number three. Way number three is Arichat Sfatayim which is arranging it with your lips. So we said way number one was to learn, to attain wisdom. Way number two is to listen. Way number three is verbalize the things that you learn. Speak them out. Speech is so powerful. Words help things become a reality. To say is to be. The power of speech. So we know Proverbs, King Solomon tells us, life and death are in the hands of the tongue.
You know the Chavetz Chaim learned an amazing thing even when he was so old and so righteous. He was once on the train and there was another Jew who met this elderly man. He didn't know it was the Chavetz Chaim and you know, they get into a conversation on the train. They're traveling together. He says to the elderly man, again the Chavetz Chaim not knowing it was him, he says, so where are you from? And he talks, he says, I'm from Raden.
Oh, you're from Raden. You have the great sage the Chavetz Chaim there. The Chavetz Chaim says, eh. So the man stands up and gives gives him a patch. He gives him a whip. He says, how dare you speak like that about the Chavetz Chaim? Obviously when they arrived at the destination this man didn't even want to leave on the same exit or the same door with the Chavetz Chaim. He was so
angry at this man speaking negatively about the Chavetz Chaim. Little did he know it was the Chavetz Chaim and he sees all these people gathered around welcoming the Chavetz Chaim. He's like, what are you guys doing here? He says, what do you mean? This is the Chavetz Chaim. And he realized what he had done. He felt terrible. The Chavetz Chaim the next day called this individual. He wanted to meet with him and he set up a whole table with delicacies to thank him
for teaching him a law. And the Chavetz Chaim includes this in his book. It is prohibited for one to say lashon hara about themselves. You're not allowed to even speak slander about yourself. You have to be so careful about the words that you use even if they're about yourself. You can, I forgo your honor, but you got to be careful how you talk. It is life to those who speak them out says King Solomon in Proverbs. It is life.
You speak them out. The words of Torah come to life when you speak them out. You hear an idea great. When you repeat it, it becomes yours. Everything we learn we need to utter with our own mouth. It's not enough to speak it out once or twice. It needs to be arranged. That's why it says arrange it with your lips. It needs to be arranged. It needs to be organized in one's own lips as
though it's placed in your pocket, the Talmud says. Our power must be heard by our own ears. Don't repeat it too quickly. Again, organize it. Now speech has five components. We have the throat, we have the jaw, we have the tongue, we have the teeth and the lips. However, sometimes we cannot speak out the words, so we say it silently like Hannah. One of our great patriarchs of the Jewish people, that she taught us what it means to speak even without talking it out.
To utter the words even silently, but make it yours. The entire body should feel your words. It says that the way a person should pray is that you're in call atmosai tomorrow. All of my bones should say the praise of God. We should feel it. We got to feel it in our bones. Saying it out loud helps you clarify fuzzy ideas when you talk it out. Many times I've seen people do this. They're learning a new idea. So like, okay, one second. Let's let me understand what you're saying.
Why do they do that? They do that because when you speak it out, you gain the clarity that is necessary to understand the matters. Ishka fi mahalolo. Our sages tell us you want to know what a person really is? See who he praises. See what he praises. If all the person is praising is cars and money, then that's what they are. If they're praising good actions, good deeds, morals, ethics, then that's who they are. Your praises defines who you are.
Everyone needs a sounding board, a feedback system. You can do it yourself. You can speak yourself. You can talk it out. Talk it out to yourself. And I've seen people do this, by the way, in the study hall where they're walking back and forth and talking to themselves the ideas, going back and forth, reviewing an entire page of Talmud by themselves. Talk it out. You gain a whole new clarity. Never say I can't
because then you won't, even if you could. My father always said, I can't means I don't want to. You know, there are a lot of things. You can bring a lot of power to this world with determination by the words that you use. When a person is determined, he says, I'm gonna do this. They'll find a way to do it. Words have a great power to bring things to life. You know, there's a famous rule that if you don't ask, the answer will always be no.
To use the power of your words and ask. In a job, you're asking for a raise, you're asking for a promotion, you're asking. If you don't ask, it may not come your way just naturally. It may not just happen like that. Sometimes it does, but usually it doesn't. You have to ask for it. With the Almighty, it's the same. You want something? Talk with the Almighty. Talk with God. Ask Him. Language is the bridge where the body meets the soul.
Talking aloud keeps you from falling asleep and daydreaming. Talk things out. It helps you concentrate. We see this in our prayers. It says that a person should pray out loud. The only part that we don't is the Amida, which is more of like a meditation-like prayer. But the rest of the prayer, you're supposed to say it out loud. Why? Because it helps you concentrate. It helps you understand the words that you're saying.
It says even the parts when you're saying it quietly, your own ears should be able to hear it, because that will add to your concentration. Most marriages that face challenges are likely due to words used. I don't have a scientific study, but I have enough experience dealing with couples that if they would have been a little bit more careful with the words they use, not saying derogatory statements, not calling names. Name-calling is the worst. But people do things that are really damaging to relationships by their words.
It's not the actions. It's the words that they use that are so hurtful. A person needs to talk to their spouse, their children, with words, kind words, nice words, encouraging words. A tool to remember things is to speak them out. We mentioned that. One of the things that we know is that when we learn, we're supposed to learn, not just to learn it and absorb the information ourselves and be selfish with it, but rather learn to teach. للمود أولي الامد.
How do we do that? When you teach, you have to speak it out. It's very, very important. Hopefully, one isn't one in mouth and one in the heart. That's a flatterer. It's someone who says one thing, but doesn't really feel it. Their heart is one place and their mouth is another place. Let's say, oh, that's really nice. And then they turn around. They're like, that's the ugliest suit I've ever seen, right? A person should be one in the heart and one in the mouth.
Speak it out and bring it to life. And some of the Jewish slogans that can help a person strengthen that core being of who they are. It's, for example, we say from Rav Nachman, it's a mitzvah to always be happy, mitzvah gadol aliyos b'simcha tameh, to always be happy. The external affects the internal. Do you know that they did a study that people who dress properly with a suit and a tie or with proper formal, they behaved properly.
People, when they dress in an informal way, act in an informal way. It has an impact. But these are things that if a person says, you know, the external affects the internal, it has an impact. But if a person is able to say words like God loves me and I love God, God is good. Thank you, Hashem. I'm so gifted. Guess what? Those positive words have a tremendous impact on changing not only the perception, but the reality.
So we know there's an important phrase that I'm sure we've all heard before. Small minds discuss people, average minds discuss events, great minds discuss ideas. You have to use your words in a positive way. Just do it. From Nike is one of the greatest slogans. You got to just do it. Accept it upon yourself and you'll figure a way to get it done. You know, someone says I'm gonna lose 20 pounds, 30 pounds, 50 pounds, 100 pounds, whatever it is that the person's goal is, speak it out, talk it out. You will reaffirm your commitment to it by doing so. So when we articulate our inner thoughts, we get our mind, our body, our soul thinking together to turn those ideas into reality. Thank you all for listening.