Jewish Inspiration Podcast · Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe

00:00 - Rabbi Aryeh Wolbe (Host)
So good evening everybody. It is so wonderful to be back here at Mussar Monday. Tonight we are going to start a completely new subject. I thought it might be a very, very good idea to at least learn the first chapter of the Ramchal's book of Mesilat Yesharim, which is the path of the just, or way of the upright, and I think it is really an amazing book. And I'll just tell you a few things from the introduction of the Ramchal and then we'll go straight into the first chapter.

00:38
The Ramchal begins by telling us that I did not write this book to teach you anything you don't know, because you know it all. You're all wise people, you're smart people, you're capable people, you're talented people and you know a lot and you're not going to learn anything new. So why am I writing this book? Because of all of the knowledge we have in these areas, we lose sight of it and we don't recognize. You ever look for your keys and the keys are right there in front of you, but you just don't see them. Why? Because you're so used to seeing them you don't recognize them. You ever paint your house and you're like, wow, I love that color. And how long does it take for you not even to realize that the color has changed. It's about a week or two and you're done. You see new drapes and it becomes normal, and you don't even realize how special it is. You buy a brand new car and you're like, ah, that leather smell. Ah, that new car smell. Ah, how long does that last? Not long. You think that I'm going to have this freshness. This noon is forever. It's always going to be like noon. I'm always going to take care of it like it's noon, and it just lasts a week, maybe two weeks, three weeks. You start throwing your coffee cups down? No, of course not, but it's just a matter of time until you get it.

02:06
So what Ramchal is teaching us here he's telling us first in the introduction is that because these things are so common for us, we don't even pay attention. I'll give you another example. Is there anybody here who doesn't think that anger is terrible? Are there showy hands? If you think anger is okay, anger is perfectly fine? No, nobody. We all agree. Yet do any of us get angry? One of the great muscles that we have that if we don't exercise it, we lose. It is an example I've given numerous times. We're all capable of being givers, but if we don't exercise the giving muscle, then we stop being givers. You have to exercise that muscle. We all know that giving is a very important thing, but yet sometimes we fall short of our responsibilities because we just haven't exercised it, we haven't thought about it.

03:05
What the Ramchal is dedicating this book to is not things we don't know. It's things we know. But it's things that, because we know them so well, they've been repeated multiple times throughout our lives, in great lengths sometimes. So we know it. Anybody know that the Anybody can ask just a random question. Anybody know what the speed limit is here, right on this road. I have no idea. We assume that the city speed limit is 35. Right, it's the city speed limit. But do we notice every time we pass a speed limit sign that, oh yeah, oh Cal, remember now 30. No, because we saw it about 50,000 times already. So, because we know it so well, we sometimes don't even know it and we're driving 55. Exactly, and also we're driving too fast to even notice. That's right.

03:59
So the first thing Ramchal is telling us in his introduction is I'm not telling you anything. You don't know Everything. I'm going to tell you you know already. However, because it's so common, because you know it so well, you don't pay attention to it. It's a very important point.

04:16
Now the next thing he says is that you have different types of people. You have the really, really smart intellectualites, these really smart people, and then you have scientists and you have all these different, and people think that only the dense minded, only the small people, only the small people really work on their traits. You know who works on their anger, the guy who's limited on his intellectual capacity. You know that's the guy who works on his traits, because us intellectual people, you know we're busy dealing with. You know with the stars and the moon and all the other galaxies, and we can tell you how to send the rocket to the moon. But you know, but for us to work on our traits. And it's funny because if you look at all of these philosophers, the great philosophers, that the worst traits you can possibly imagine, the worst traits. They were arrogant, they were selfish, they were madmen, but they were brilliant. So just because someone is smart, sometimes they think this is beyond me. I'm so much greater than working on kindness, working on patience, working on, you know, on arrogance. I'm just too smart for this. This is for the people who don't have as much intellect as I do, and it's a big mistake, and the Ramchal tells us.

05:50
I'm here writing this book for those who desire to get close to God, for those who desire to be God-like. The word Adam, which is mankind we all know, comes from the word Adamah, which means from the earth, because man was taken from the earth. God took earth and molded man. What does that have to do with us? So God created us from the earth. So therefore we're earth. Now what? So if you take the word Adam, it also, the root of it, is also Adamah. Not only Adamah, which is earth, but Adamah, which means to emulate, to be God-like. That's our purpose in this world is to be God-like. How God-like can we become? God is all patient. God is all kind. God is all giving. God is all forgiving. God is all forgetting of our sins. God is all patient. Those are the traits we, as Adam, as mankind, we're trying to emulate. We're trying to emulate God's traits.

06:58
You ever wonder how much patience a parent has for a child? Sometimes very limited. Imagine how much more patience God has for us, much more than a parent has for a child. You guarantee it. Sometimes a parent can say you know what, put that video game on and just get out of here, just go, just go. Yes, buy it, no problem, just go.

07:22
I had students many years ago. Majority of my students were from Los Angeles and the guy who got cheaped out these were all 17-year-olds. So since they were 16, they had their own cars. And the guy who was a cheap guy got only a Lexus. The other guys were all driving beamers and I asked them. I said I don't understand which one of your parents thought it was a good idea for a 16-year-old boy to have a BMW? Who thought it was a good idea? You know what their answer was Our parents just didn't want to deal with us. So they gave us a car and go, just get out of my life. And it's a terrible thing.

08:08
Hashem says no, no, no, I want you, I want to have a relationship, and sometimes in that relationship, god has to mold circumstances to get us to be committed to that relationship, just as he wants us to be committed to that relationship. What the Ramchal then continues to say is that the true service of God does not require one to inflict pain upon themselves or to distance themselves from pleasure. You know, one of the big contrasts that Judaism has with other religions is that in many other religions, or at least in a few in particular, in order to grow spiritually, you need to remove yourself physically, you need to be materialistically ignorant in order to connect spiritually. And we know that there are priests. The priests can't get married because they have to refrain from all worldly pleasures. So in order to grow spiritually, you have to remove yourself physically. In Judaism it's not the case. In Judaism, you cannot grow spiritually without the physical and taking that physical and elevating it. So you need to take the physical world that we're living in and make it spiritual.

09:24
Why do we make a blessing on food? Because now that this food becomes a vessel through which you connect Hashem to the Almighty, now this food is no longer food. This food now became a vessel of spirituality. That's why we say make a blessing. It's not we can eat because we want to satiate our hunger, or we can eat to give us energy to serve God. We're doing. The same act of eating Could be eating with someone eating a hot dog, a burger. Okay, so we both ordered the same burger. Great, one makes a blessing and one doesn't make a blessing. Is this still the same food? Well, potentially it Looks like the same food, but when one makes a blessing on that food, the food, that food became a vessel through which one connected to the Almighty. It's no longer food Now, it's all spiritual. That food became a tool through which you can connect to God, to the other. It may just be materialistic food, physical food.

10:29
We see that there are different ways we can live in this world. We can live a completely physical world life a completely Spiritual or what seems to be spiritual world that is removed from all physical, or we can live in a perfect blend of both, and that's what Judaism is. Judaism is all about blending the two worlds of physical and spiritual. The big question is how to do that. How do you take something physical and make it spiritual? So that's one of the things that the Ramallah will focus on now.

11:04
Many people also think that in order to get to the point where I am spiritual, I have to inflict pain upon myself, so I remove myself even more from a Physical world. I'm, you know, there's this, this idea that people roll Unclothes in snow, right, that's a form of affliction. It's a form of a of purification, sort of like removing all physical elements full Ramallah says that that's not. That's not. That's not gonna get you any whole year, that's not gonna get you any cause. I want to do that as a as a as a an activity. If you go to Alaska and you want to experience what it means to be freezing gold, there are people who do that. That's not the way the Torah wants, that's not the way the Almighty wants us to connect to him.

11:53
Oh, so there are times is the right time for it. You see that by the by, by Mordechai and Esther, there was a time and could. It was a very limited time. It's three days of Of sack of the ashes. That's what that time required. But it's not a regular state of existence. We see the same with with like you have to shop off the ninth of off, you have a 25 hour period. You sit on the floor, you don't eat right. Okay, that there's a time for that as well.

12:28
But look at Shabbos, on the other hand. On Shabbos is a miss for to eat. By the way, there's this myth that calories don't count on Shabbos, they count right after Shabbos. On Shabbos they don't, right after Shabbos they do. But there's a special midst of it to eat on Shabbos, and not only to eat, to eat the finest foods you can get. It's a Talmud tells us that one of the great sages would go to the marketplace on Sunday. You see this really nice, good, good, juicy piece of meat, right? So you say, ah, I found the meat for Shabbos. And the next day it come to the marketplace again and he found the even better cut of meats. He says, ah, I found a great piece of meat. This is for Shabbos comes Tuesday, and then Every day, because the focus is, yeah, what's the best I can get for Shabbos.

13:16
People sometimes have the question as to well, can you afford Shabbos? I mean it's, it's you know you're buying meat and you're buying good food. You can get. We can get costly, god tells the Jewish people. By the way, this is a promise. Anybody can take it to the bank. Take it to the bank. Levu alive. Any poor a borrow on me. You don't have money, no problem for Shabbos. Borrow on me, I pay you back. I got you covered. It's a promise from God. Try it. If you do have the money, then you better spend it, but if you don't have the money, you're cautious. Oh well, I don't know that. You know what that says. I'll cover that expense. And that expense does not include, it doesn't go into the account of the set amount of income that one is designated for rosh Hashanah.

14:07
On rosh Hashanah, one of the things that we have judgment on Is how much money will we earn that year from rosh Hashanah to rosh Hashanah? The money for Shabbos is not included. That's on top of it depends on what you spend. Might as well. Eat good food. God is saying eat on me, it's on the house. Order anything you want from the menu, it's on me. Do it for the honor of Shabbos. So it's just another idea of how the Jewish people don't run away from materialism. We don't run away from delicacies. On the contrary, there's a right path through which we connect with delicacies and materialism, not just for self gratification, but for glorification of God. And again, we're living in a culture or in a world where that's sort of like what isn't that hypocritical, isn't that? How can you be godly and be physical? We'll get to that. Any questions so far? A shy crowd here. Okay, god, give you a credit card, absolutely.

15:12
Let's begin with the beginning of the first chapter. The beginning of the first chapter is as follows Yisodah Hasidut, vishoreshah Avodah Hat Mima, who? I'm going to translate every word, who she is? Barer v'it'amed etso Ha'dam ahovat bolam. So the Ramchal begins the following In the following way. He says Yisodah Hasidut, the foundation of true piety, vishoreshah Avodah Hat Mima, and the root of perfect service of Hashem. We focus here for a second on the words. We give two different types of definitions. We give the foundation of true piety foundation, and the other is the root Of perfect service of Hashem.

16:00
Anybody notice two different types of things here? One is a foundation and one is a root. What is a root? A root of a tree or root grows organically. What is a foundation? Foundation is man-made. You dig down, you put the bricks and you put all the all of the foundation. That's necessary there, all the cement or whatever it is. And the deeper the foundation, the taller the building, the wider the foundation, the wider the building. It all depends on how you built the foundation. You built a solid foundation. You can build a solid building on top of it. You built a weak foundation. You'll have a weak building on top of it. But that is all in your hands, so to speak. It's something which you control. It's something which is in your hands. It's your choice.

16:55
What is something like a root, like a root of a tree that grows organically? You got to give it time. The more you water it, the more you nurture it, the stronger, the bigger, the taller and the deeper it gets. These are two separate functions. My grandfather mentions this when he talks about education, educating children, says you need these two functions. For education, you need the function of planting and you need the function of building. The times the child needs encouragement the child needs. You know you need to be built and that's when you're doing that building. And there are times you just have to let it grow, let the child grow. And you can't, you know, think about about it like this I had a friend of mine who brought over to my house a, an etero tree, a citrus tree, and it was this little little citrus tree and we planted it and of course, you have to wait three years before, because you have the laws.

18:04
Of the Torah tells us you can't touch a fruit tree For the first three years. You can just go out. You got to let it grow wild after three years. Then you can start enjoying from its fruit. Imagine that, after you know, forget a fruit tree. But you, just, you have my children.

18:22
Sometimes they bring home this little little, a little cup with dirt in it. I'm like what's in that cup? They're like, oh, if we water it? My teacher told me that if you water it, then you know we're gonna start seeing it grow and then we'll find out. So what do we? What happens? Let's see you water a little bit water, another little bit water, another little bit. And then a few days later you start seeing the buds coming out. Like, oh, it's so exciting, the buds are there. But you know what? I want it to be a full tree already. So let's grab those buds and let's pull it out right, so that way it becomes a tree. What's gonna happen? You're gonna ruin your whole plant. Why? Because you're gonna pull out its roots. You can't force growth of something organic. All right, you have to let the growth. You have to let the roots take their take their, take their way, let them establish themselves so that it can continue to grow. So we have these two ways in which we grow as human beings.

19:26
There are parts of us that need to be built and parts that need to get their roots in Just a few examples of this. If you try to teach a four-year-old how to drive a car, you might be devastated that your car got crashed and you can't figure out why. I don't understand. I told them what to do. I don't understand why they just don't follow instructions because they're not exactly, at that time, ready for this kind of information. That doesn't mean that there isn't one kid in China who can ride a tractor or drive a bus. We're not saying that there isn't somebody out there who's skilled in those areas.

20:13
They're children, these miracle babies who are two years old. They can read a whole book of Harry Potter and understand it. They have the greatest vocabulary in the world and they can pass any of those games. The game shows. What are they? Wheel of Fortune or any of those Jeopardy Jeopardy so talented that's not the majority of us. We all have these two functions. One is that we need to be built in. That, by the way, for the most part is the responsibility of a parent is to build that child, is to give them the support and to give them the encouragement and to give them the freedom when needed as well. But to keep on building, that doesn't really stop at any point they say, oh well, they're 18. Goodbye, get out. This needs a constant life. Job of a parent is to build and to build and to build. But then we have another part, which is organic.

21:14
For example, our sages tell us that the Mishra says that at the age of three, a child learns one thing. At the age of five, a child learns another thing. At the age of 10, a child learns another thing, not one thing. But at the beginning, when a child is able to talk, they start teaching them Torah tzivala numoshah. That's the first you teach them emuna. You teach them faith. The first thing you teach a child is to say Torah tzivala numoshah. The Torah was commanded to us by Moshe, so that you right away instill in that child faith in Hashem, in His Torah.

21:56
Then, when they're five, they start learning chomash, they start learning the Torah. When they're 10, they start learning Mishnah. When they're 15, they start learning Talmud. When they're 13, they're obligated in Mitzvot. For males, for females it's 12 years old. We discussed that the 12 and 13 year, why it's 12 for a female and why it's 13 for a male. We discussed that in our Talmud class on Fridays at 12 o'clock Lunch. And learn, be there. And then, at 18, that's time to get married.

22:29
Shruna isi olahupah, there's a time for everything when you're 20, when you're 30, when you're 40, when you're 50, 60, 70, each one the Mishnah in p'r Keravot, in ethics of our fathers, gives us an exact responsibility of what we're obligated to at that time or what we mature to at that time. Why, why can't I teach them Talmud when they're 5 years old? Because you'll do damage to the child. They're not ready for it. There's a right time for things. You have to let them grow organically. It needs to come at the right time. You can't force it on the child. You can't force it on an adult. If someone comes to work for you, you expect them day one. Let's go, do this, do this, do this, do this. You come the next day. Where are the jobs I gave you? I can't remember everything you said. What do you mean? You can't remember. I told you. You understand. It takes time for them to acclimate their new environment, to figure out what needs to be done. That's a normal state of our growth.

23:30
We have these two functions. The first thing that I'm telling us is that there are these two functions. That is, he who will be able to acclimate the man? What will he have in his life? The first part is that it has to become clear and verify to himself, to a person, what is his obligation in his world.

23:57
My grandfather asked, teaching us how to learn the writings of Ramcham, rabbi Moshe Chaim Watzato, the author of this incredible work. He says there's a duplicitous terminology To clarify and verify. What do you need, these two different terminologies? So this is a theme that you see throughout the writing of Ramcham, where he's using these two, a duplicitous term. Can anybody explain what the difference is between clarifying and verifying? Seems the same almost. How do you get to true piety and the root of perfect service of Ramcham? It is formed by a person clarifying and verifying. Let's understand something. We have two very different functions. Hold ahead for a second. We have two different functions that make our decisions, or that at least should make our decisions. I'll tell you a story, and I've shared the story before here.

24:59
I got a phone call from a dear friend of mine. He says to me what do I do? He says my wife called me up. She went out shopping and she said she found this amazing dress for 70% off and it's only $350. And she wants to know if she should buy it. And he says he was young, young, I said $350, what? When I go on a wedding, we don't need to. It's like $350 for that. Absolutely, are you crazy? We can't afford that. You know we can't afford that. She says but it's 70% off. You know how much money I'm saving, do you understand? And he says but we can't afford it.

25:41
Now, what's this argument that's going on? What's going on is that she has an emotional desire to buy this garment. It's her heart, she has his intellect which tells him we can't afford it. I don't care how beautiful it is, I don't care why you want it, I don't care how many percent off, but right. So you have these two functions the desire I want this and, on the other hand, the intellect which says this is no good. I'll give you another example Someone who you don't like says something.

26:13
You don't like this person for whatever reason, and you want to say something and just fight back at them. So you have that line, it's ready to go, it's a zinger of all zingers and you're going to lace into them. And it's the perfect crowd because you can embarrass them and you just got them nailed. So your heart is saying go, get them, get them, get them. And your intellect says you know something. Not the right thing to do. As much as I want to, it's just not the right thing to do. So it's not the question of which one. The question is who's going to win? Who's going to win? The intellect or the emotion? That's the real question. A person wants you have.

26:55
Someone is saying about how great their new, their new boat is. No, they just bought this little jet ski and you want to one up them and tell them you know, you know, when I was a kid, I rode those kinds of things. Now I drive, I ride fast things. You don't want to one up them, right, so you want to. You want to gloat, you want to show off. Your emotion tells you yeah, I really want everyone to know how. For your intellect is telling you you know what. Maybe, hopefully, if your intellect works properly, hopefully you would tell you you know what. Let them show off and let them be proud of their thing and don't steal their thunder. But who's going to win?

27:36
How many times do we just want to say something and we can't hold ourselves back, even though we know it's going to do us damage. Ask any married man. Don't say it. Just don't say it. You have to say it. Why did you have to say it? Just hold back, keep quiet for 10 more minutes and you're in the safe zone, right? No, right, you agree All the time, because we get used to following our emotion versus our intellect.

28:04
If you look at television, if you look at movies or if you look at, it's all targeting your emotions. That's all it is. You watch a football game Guess what? As soon as it's getting exciting time out. Okay, now they're going to take a five minute commercial and they're going to try to sell you anything from buffalo wings to cars, to shampoo, to and everything is going to sell. They're not going to be sad. People like I really can't afford this car. It's terrible, bad decision, right? No, no, no. It's going to be like Woo, happy holidays, right? A brand new car, zero down, zero APR. Zero, zero, zero, zero. Just come in, sign and go. They're trying to work with your emotion and look how beautiful that car is and it comes with a big, huge ribbon on top. Right, you go to the store. It's like no ribbon, right, they're dealing all with our emotions.

28:55
And that's the problem is that we're not exercising using our intellect enough. So what the Ramchal is telling us, number one, is you have two functions your mind and your heart. Now let me ask you a question. Everybody know why the Golan Heights is so important to the state of Israel. Golan Heights, why is it strategic advantage? Because it's up high. Whoever is on high controls Right.

29:21
It works the same in the physiology of man. You know. Animals are all horizontal, most All horizontal. Man is vertical. Why? Well, not only because we're higher, because your mind is supposed to be your primary function. You're supposed to follow your mind, not your heart. The problem is, sometimes it doesn't get up to the top, because we are so instinctive and impulsive with our actions and reactions, so we don't end up using our mind properly. So, instead of becoming people who use our intellect to make our decisions, which is at the top, we skip the top and go straight to our heart.

30:02
See, the reason why animals are all at the same height is because have you has anyone ever seen a camel with a college degree? Anybody ever see a cat worrying? Where am I going to get food for my children tonight? How am I going to feed them. What's going to be on the table for Shabbos? You never saw a cat worrying about that. Why? Because they live in a very, very different existence than we do and they live in a world of much more trust of the Almighty. God feeds all of His creatures. It's part of our blessings that we say every day that God feeds all of His creations, everyone, including human beings, everybody. That's God's job. But we don't trust God enough. So, like we got to worry for it, we got to take care of it. Animals are. The word in Hebrew for animals is Beheema, bethe, memhe, which also, if you divide the word Bethe and Memhe, it's two different words which is Ba, ma, which is within. It is everything.

31:11
You take a cat, for example, which is one minute old, and you put it on the rooftop. You know what will happen. You look around Nice place, got a nice pad over here, right. Looks around, he walks to the edge of the roof. He looks down Not a good idea Turns around, walks away. Take a one-year-old baby and put it on a rooftop. Where do you think they're going Right down? Why? Because we're Adam. Adam is like the earth, like we mentioned earlier. The earth. You need to plow, you need to sow, you need to nourish it, you need to teach it. It's instincts you need to teach it. We grow like what comes from the soil, from the earth.

31:55
If you don't plant, you ever drive out to West Texas, like really far west, like 700 miles from here west, and just see a beautiful table on the side of the road, set in beautiful, you know, with flowers and chairs around it. Would anybody think that that just happened on its own? No, obviously Someone needed to do something to get it there. Would you ever go in the middle of a desert and find a beautiful apple tree? No, unless someone actually went there and planted it. These things don't just happen on their own. You have to plant it in order for it to grow. You need to do something for it in order for it to grow.

32:40
Animals don't need schooling to get their instincts. A lion doesn't need to learn how to kill another animal in school. It's built in. They have this built in. Their instincts are built in. That's the same with this. As small as an ant, even the lice, which is the smallest of ants, knows exactly where it needs to be, when it needs to be, how it needs to be, everything all the way to the biggest animal. It has all its instincts built in. Now, it doesn't mean they can't learn tricks, it doesn't mean they can't ride a unicycle and juggle at the same time, but their instincts are the instincts.

33:21
There was once an argument, they say, between the rhombom and other great philosophers, where they argued whether or not you can change the nature of something. The rhombom said you can't change the nature. They said well, why don't you come? Come to the palace and we'll show you cats that can serve as waiters. We trained them. He says but you still can't. You can train them, but you can't change their nature. They said oh well, we'll show you. So they go in. He goes in and he sits down and they're about to serve his foot and indeed the cats are coming out. And he said you see, you see, the cats are coming out with the trays and they're serving, just like. It's unbelievable, like he pulls out of his pocket a little bag and in the bag there's a little mouse. He lets the mouse go, they drop the plates and they run. You can train it, but you can't change its nature. You can't change its nature. It's all built in. It's not because they were trained very well as children. It's in the nature of who they are.

34:23
Man, we have a lot of things in our nature. One of them is that we're extremely lazy. You know why? See this pen, this marker. What happens if I leave go of it? It falls down. Guess what? We're just like this marker. We like to just relax, sit back on the beach chair, sit back on the recliner, get comfortable. We don't want to go out, we don't want to run, we don't want, we have to. We might be motivated by career, we might be motivated by money, we might be motivated by honor, we might be motivated by a lot of different things, but by nature we're heavy, we're lazy. That's the way we are. How it talks about that. This way starts right away in the beginning of the sixth chapter. That's the way he starts.

35:12
The nature of man is that we're extremely sluggish. He doesn't want to just be in the air floating around. He just drops down and that's it. Leave me alone. That's the way we are. So how do we change that? Well, that's what the Ram Hala is teaching in his book. How do we become people that go get them versus people who are just? This is the way it is. I'm just tired, I'm just, you know I'm old. Leave me alone. You know that's what the Ram Hala is dealing with. So now we have these two different functions. We said what are the two functions? Intellect, our mind, our intellect, and our heart, our emotion. Interesting that in the Shema.

35:54
I remember the last chapter we spoke in the Shema we spoke about you should not go run after your impulse, your urges of your heart and your eyes, so saying right, the eyes are connected to the heart. The eye sees, the heart desires. If you didn't look at their purse or their shoes, you wouldn't desire it, but you look Now you want it. That's why don't ever let your wife go window shopping. It's just going to cost you more because she's just going window shopping. You know what happens a week later? No longer window shopping, it's shopping, shopping because all those things, all those desires, all of those wants that they saw are now there. It's just a very interesting thing of how our eyes have a very strong impact on us, but we have to let our intellect operate.

36:49
So let me ask a question. Let's follow. If I know that humility is a very good trait, does that mean that I will start being humble no. So you see that there's a difference between clarifying it and understanding it and verifying it, meaning making it part of my existence. Very different. You can see 100 videos about safe driving and still be a terrible driver because you haven't put it into practice. Just because you know something doesn't mean you do something. A person can know how to pray it doesn't mean they pray. A person can know how to play basketball doesn't mean they actually can play basketball. So I always wonder about coaches and yelling at their players do this, do that, get on the field and let's see. You try to do that, let's see right, it's like easy to say it right, but can you do it? It's the same thing with our traits Easy for us to say what's right and what's wrong, but let's see if we can actually put it into our actions in a daily, in a daily right. So this is so.

37:57
Whenever they're on pause, using this duplicitous terminology, what he's saying is it's a stage one understand it. Stage two internalize it. Make it part of your daily routine, make it part of your doing on a regular basis. Two very different worlds. My grandfather always says that there are two different parts of Musar study. There's learning Musar. And then there's the work of Musar. There's the learning of Musar, which is to just know, get an understanding of what it is that we should be doing, and then it's how do we implement it and get it into our daily routines?

38:45
Verify is just a terminology used in the translation. If you do it in the Hebrew, it should become clear to clarify, make it real within yourself. He uses the term verify, but it really is to make it real within yourself. It's not just a concept. It's a terrible thing to yell. It's terrible. Did you hear what I said? I said it's a terrible thing to yell.

39:16
It's like people don't even realize that they could be saying something and they themselves not even following through on what they know is the right thing. You know there are people they could preach something and yet completely not live by what they preach. They don't live it. Why? It's not because they're evil people. It's because they haven't harnessed this mechanism of learning it. Knowing it does not mean that you'll actualize it, and that's what the Ram Chalaz identifying right in the beginning. Okay, it means it's not enough for you to have clarity on this. You also have to make it real, you have to implement it, put it into your daily practice. So think about it. We all know that. Yeah, I always tell, say this, we learned this previously that everything that you see going on around you is a message. It's a message.

40:15
You ever stand there with your friend and he sees something and you don't see it. Or she sees it and you don't see it, and you're like you're standing right there, they saw it, like whoa Right, and you're like what, what just happened? Like you didn't see it was right in front of your face, like how could you not see it? Guess what? God didn't want you to see it. There's nothing you can learn from that story, perhaps, which is why God didn't want you to see it. The person right next to you had to learn a lesson. There was something that they needed to learn from that experience, which is why, or a message they were supposed to get from it, which is why they saw it and you didn't see it. You're right there.

40:50
The Valshemt of I believe it is that says that everything you see is like a mirror. You see someone yelling at their child in Walmart and you say, oh, they look like lunatics. I'm getting to the other aisle, right. I'm just going away, right. You know why you had to see that. Just know it's a mirror of how you look when you get angry. That's exactly the way you look when you're trying to discipline your child. Sometimes it's a wake-up call. Now that doesn't mean that you'll stop doing it.

41:23
So just because you know that it's a terrible thing, anybody here think that stealing is a good thing? No, everybody knows that stealing is a terrible thing. Is there anybody here who can say that they've never even slightest done anything Like even one penny? One penny off? We hope that's what we aspire to be, not even on the taxes and not on anything. Not one penny. Well, a little bit here, maybe a little bit over there, but it's not significant. It's just a toothpick. I tell my children we go to a restaurant. Sometimes when you go out they have these candies. So some people think this means stock up. It's like candies, I'm missing a few in my car. They grab a few and now they have for their car and the toothpicks, what? So?

42:18
There's a story that one of the Tauneic sages was walking on a shortcut and he stopped. On the shortcut there was a little picket fence. So the sage took a little piece of a little sliver of a piece of the picket fence and he used it as a toothpick. So the daughter said the daughter of the landowner said to the rabbi, you have to pay for that. He says what's this? It's a little sliver of what it's nothing. He said yeah, but then the next person comes, takes a little. The next person comes, before I know it, I don't have a fence. He said you're right, it's forbidden, you're not allowed to do that. Then you have to pay because it's just a toothpick. It's just a toothpick.

43:04
Now, it could very well be that the restaurants don't mind. That's like the sort of the thank you for shopping here, thank you for coming to our restaurant, take a few candies and take a few. I tell my children that you're not meant to take more than one, because if everybody takes 10, then I can have any. So take one, not one for later. Now, it's one for now. I want them to learn that you have to be careful about even a toothpick from a restaurant. Now please don't write me notes about how you never took another toothpick from a restaurant and don't reprimand anybody saying you know you're a thief. Okay, you took two toothpicks, right? The rabbi said you're a thief, I'm not saying that. Okay, yeah, please don't tell me the other rabbi, the one down the block, the fact that we know something doesn't mean you know.

43:59
I bet that if you went over to Mr Madoff and you say, tell me, is stealing a good thing? He said stealing is a terrible thing, it's immoral, it's unethical, you shouldn't do it right. So what happened? So what happened? Just because you know something doesn't mean you do something. And that's what the Ramchal is feeding up again and again. It's not enough to know something, you have to put it into actualization. By the way, it's every area like this. It's also religiously, with things right, we could know about Shabbos. It doesn't mean we actually observe Shabbos. We could know about prayer it doesn't mean we actually pray. We could know about mitzvahs it doesn't mean we actually observe them. It's also about our traits. Just because we know that something is a good or a bad trait doesn't mean that we do or don't do them. So he says who she'd? Barare v'it'amed etzela, adam ma'chov, atob olamo.

44:53
A person needs to clarify and make real to themselves what is his obligation in his world. So my grandfather points this out as one of the very, very important and critical teachings of the Ramchal. What is his obligation? Not in the world? In his world, every single individual, every single one of us here in this room, has their own obligation in their own world. You were born in Des Moines, iowa, right, and you were born to a very specific family with siblings, with parents, aunts, uncles of your own right. This is your world, this is your own perfect world, and you know what you, as an individual, have, your challenge that you need to perfect in your world. So now the person sitting next to you says to you hey, that's so interesting that you do that. You know that you shouldn't do this or you shouldn't do that and like not understanding, perhaps, what your world is. Their world is a different world when they grew up. It might be a different way in which they conduct themselves.

46:09
So what happens is that sometimes we think, well, we're all in a world together, right, and therefore we should all have the same set of standards. Well, that's not necessarily true. Yeah, we should have laws. The laws should be the same set of laws, but as individuals, everyone has their own purpose and they have their own responsibility and they have their own set of things that they need to accomplish during their lifetime, and what your obligation to accomplish in your lifetime can and most likely is very different than any other person in this room, and nobody in this room has the same purpose. Okay, so that's going to lead to another question. Well, rabbi, what's my purpose? Why am I here? Okay, that's all we have their own path for and that's what we're going to be learning in the coming weeks.

47:04
Mahovato beolamo, what is your obligation in your world? You were born with a certain set of skills. You are an individual. You are unique. There will never, ever be a Benjamin again like you, ever, ever, ever. There will never be one like you Wonder.

47:25
Well, why did God give me all of my characteristics, all of my life situation? For what? So that I just be like another Joe? Why, god gave me exactly what I need to be the greatest me. Oh, now I have to start investigating. Who is me, who am I? That's our job. That's the entire purpose of what Orm Ha'u is writing.

47:51
Let's identify who we are and then, once we identify who we are, we got to make it real and actually focus our attention to accomplish what we need to accomplish throughout our lifetime. So I have a worksheet of understanding our own traits, which has a random selection of 13 positive traits and 13 negative traits, and you can mark yourself where you feel you are in those traits. Now, some of those traits you may not even recognize. They even possess those traits, positive or negative, like me. Nah, I never get angry. Nah, that doesn't exist. Well, you have to think into it. What is really anger? Arrogance, me, arrogance, right? There are many different traits that are listed over there, positive and negative traits. I'll be happy to send them out, god willing, next week I'll have copies for everyone.

48:51
But to just get to identify that we are a unique individual, every single one of us. There's no to use, there never will be. Just like your DNA is different, just like your fingerprint is different, so too your personality is different. Your purpose in this world is different, your uniqueness in this world is different and your job, your obligation of what you need to accomplish on planet Earth is very special and different than what anybody else is required to accomplish in their lifetime. So our big goal, hopefully with understanding the coming teachings of the Ramchal, is to get as much of an understanding as possible into ourselves of who we really are and putting it into action. That, my friends, thank you so much. Have a good evening. Thank you for joining us.